Facebook Faceplant

I took a big ole Facebook faceplant this afternoon. I created a Facebook page months ago in an attempt to better communicate with people within the university where I work. That didn't really happen. Instead, I've amassed a motley crew of friends, classmates and former acquaintances. But it's still a work thing.

In typical style, given uncertaintly and a bit of mild conflict, I just avoided the situation and didn't log on for months. But I still get email notifications saying that so-and-so has requested you as a friend on Facebook. So today, I logged in and "friended" a ton of people...and then answered a question in my Facebook messaging box from someone I don't know. He wanted to know how not to "crush your junk when you do yoga," as he put it. After dispatching some sage advice about NOT wearing boxers at yoga, I said hi to a guy from gradeschool who posted an adorable picture of his unshaven face and a little baby...you know, the kinds of pictures that advertising firms use to get women to ovulate and/or buy perfume.

and then I requested Facebook friendship from a dude from grade school who appears to live in LA. I've actually tried to find him via google b/c my mom said that he was in LA. But I never could find him.

And then I clicked on a picture of another friend and learned that a cool guy I know...my first hookup after my first love and I were definitively no longer together(can you tell I'm mincing words?)...has become a firefighter. So, at least, I can say I have retroactively hooked up with a firefighter. That counts for something, right?

and I joined my gradeschool class of 1990 facebook group and looked at a picture of a little blond boy with smooth skin and shining eyes that turned out to be me.

Then I logged out and walked outside. The soft afternoon sunlight and cool ocean breeze felt real, good, and strange all at once. Being in once place at one time felt real, good, and strage after being in that bizzare time capsule that is Facebook.