how to give yourself a wet willy

to give yourself a wet willie without actually sticking a wet finger in your ear is easy. All you need to do is accidentally drop your right ear bud into a cup of black tea that's gone cold. You let the ear bud sit on your desk for two hours, then insert it in your ear, sure it's dry by now.

and now it's time to squirm as memories of gross people sticking wet fingers in your ear rush into your brain. Remove ear bud and watch drop of tea pour out of the little holes in the ear bud.

repeat.